Grief Became My Identity

$1,200.00

I am bound by what I loved.
My arms are stretched wide, not in surrender, but in exposure — to memory, to loss, to the weight of what cannot be undone.

The heart that crowns me is no longer only mine. It presses into my thoughts, overtakes my mind, rewrites my body. From it spill the bandages meant to heal, yet they bind me instead. I cannot move. I cannot turn away. Grief has fixed me here.

Once, I was soft. Once, I was open. Now I am wrapped, layered, restrained by sorrow that has become my shelter and my weapon both. I stand suspended between love and paralysis, carrying the cost of devotion long after the body learns it must survive

“Grief became my identity.
My shelter.
My shield.
My sword.”

“Terrified to let go,
to lose you once again.”

This piece is accompanied by two full poems written during its creation, available in the blog section of my website

I am bound by what I loved.
My arms are stretched wide, not in surrender, but in exposure — to memory, to loss, to the weight of what cannot be undone.

The heart that crowns me is no longer only mine. It presses into my thoughts, overtakes my mind, rewrites my body. From it spill the bandages meant to heal, yet they bind me instead. I cannot move. I cannot turn away. Grief has fixed me here.

Once, I was soft. Once, I was open. Now I am wrapped, layered, restrained by sorrow that has become my shelter and my weapon both. I stand suspended between love and paralysis, carrying the cost of devotion long after the body learns it must survive

“Grief became my identity.
My shelter.
My shield.
My sword.”

“Terrified to let go,
to lose you once again.”

This piece is accompanied by two full poems written during its creation, available in the blog section of my website

Grief Became My Reality is a needle-felted spirit figure created in April 2025 as part of my ongoing Broken Heart Series. This piece marks a pivotal expansion of that body of work — a moment when the broken heart evolved from a singular symbol into a fully embodied spirit form.

The figure is posed in the posture of crucifixion, representing emotional immobilization rather than religious devotion. The broken heart positioned at the top signifies grief overtaking the mind. From that heart emerge ribbon-like bands, resembling bandages, that wrap the body tightly. Though intended to heal, they instead restrain, symbolizing how prolonged grief can become both refuge and prison.

This piece was created during a period of profound mourning. It reflects how grief can consume identity, distort movement, and redefine the self until nothing remains untouched.

Materials, Size, and Construction

  • Needle-felted wool over wire armature

  • Approximately 12 inches tall

  • Arms span approximately 10 inches

  • Created over 25 hours of hand felting

  • One-of-a-kind sculptural fiber artwork